During the COVID-19, many couples, partners, & family members are now working from home together, and with kids, which at first may have seemed exciting. However, after the first day or week being together, it may have become more challenging than previously thought, especially if you have kids that are at home in the mix too.
Patience may not stay a virtue for long in this situation as in if one of you need to be on a conference call while the other is doing a Zoom video or updating your boss on the phone, who attends to the kids, how do you divvy up chores, when it seems like everything is getting messier all the time. ? When you go from being away from each other all day to suddenly occupying the same space 24/7, it’s vital you find some “you” time, sort of like a time-out area you can go to as most families aren’t use to being together all day, everyday, and weekends. Although it’s important to find that special time to re-kindle, or that special times spent with your kids, it’s also important to create some “you” time as well. You may find yourself sleeping in more or you’ve developed sleeping problems, staying up later throwing off your whole routine. Maybe you wonder what you’re going to do with your day & seem to get lost in where the day begins or ends with nothing to signal when it’s time to move on to the next task. Do your fears around this pandemic dominate your conversations, leaving you feeling down more often than not? Are the bills piling up and boredom setting in at the same time with no where to go or a usual place you need to be or want to go to? Many of us are in such a whirlwind of emotions during this time trying to find our new norm, & people miss the opportunities being given at the same time. “Perception is Projection”. First of all there is the blessing of families making new & fun memories together including the chance to really get to create deeper bonds. It doesn’t all have to be serious with gloom & doom. Make time time to dust off the games sitting on the shelf or water colors & have family/couple game time, creative session with art, or playing new games outside while getting that much needed vitamin D! Put the phones, iPads & computers away & do something different. Take time to laugh as that releases endorphins in the body & feeds your feel good energy & lowers stress. You can make a game out of everyone doing chores...create fun rewards. You could listen to music & dance or sing together, especially if you have musically or vocally talented people & even if you don’t, who cares, you can still have fun with it. You do your best creating the new norm, creating projects, talk on the phone, giving & receiving support doing your best as anything less would not be you. Focus on the things you can control & take a break if you need to in order to keep your cool. Here are the main 5 things you can do to help keep your structure and sanity, plus a list of ideas to help you in your day to day tasks: Schedule time-outs for “yourself” Plan (and agree upon) a daily routine Respect your work environment (and your spouses) Do one thing together each day Remember compliments, rewards and praise will get you everywhere. Look for what people are doing right around you and let them know. Here’s a list of what couples can do to make this transition easier on everyone: -Keep in mind that this is just temporary & to take deep breaths. Things could be much worse. -How can you turn this around and use your creative mind to think outside the box and see this as a time for learning and growth. -Set some new SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable/Action oriented, Realistic, and Time oriented) goals -Create or enforce “healthy” boundaries -Start a new schedule, calendar or whiteboard with consistency: wake up time, who’s doing what & what times, baby’s nap times, scheduling Zoom meetings with work and kids/teachers, recording things for on-line business or podcasts, doing conference calls while the other one watches the kids, keeping up with laundry & regular meals (which is double/triple the usual load + the additional messes), take turns helping so chores are shared more. -Some kids, including adults are very fearful and confused right now, so how can you help to ease their fears & provide more comfort & support to them? -Set aside or better yet, schedule in family & couples fun time so there’s something to look forward to each day -Schedule time for yourself to recharge whether its to meditate, take a hot bath, workout at home, do some journaling, scrapbooking art, listen to music, organize things, read, do your nails, etc -Start a new on-line business -Make one on one time for yourselves as a couple and time to talk and share with each other -Do thoughtful things for each other -Surprise each other -Do something different each day for yourself and your spouse/partner & lighten up. -Can you think of something kind you could do for a neighbor (mow their lawn) or business (purchase a Gift Certificate for someone to not only help a small business locally, but also for something nice to do for someone else and leaves you feeling so much better to know you did a kind act of service to help someone else. These are just some ideas to get you thinking in addition to all the things you can be grateful for, including the many blessings you do have in your life. It’s important to remember to continue on with practicing self-care for you and yours. If your struggling with challenges however, I am here for you & happy to help with Relationship Success Coaching, NLP, or Hypnosis. We have many options, some are online such as our very affordable group coaching & even Hypnosis recordings that are very affordable you can purchase on-line to listen to in the convenience of your own home. I’m also available for live with Zoom or by phone as well! You can find out more by visiting my website at www.careystubblefield.com Stay positive! Always be your best, Carey “Where Focus goes, Energy Flows”, so make your focus count. ☺️❤️